The Blended Blog TEst: lana

Create28 Week 1

"Alison," "christy," "Create 28," "lana," "lisa," "Sarah," "sheila," "style," "style challenge," "Whitney"

June 08, 2016
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Hippity Hoppity, Easter's On It's Way!

"easter," "lana," "Spring Fever"

March 21, 2016
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It's the first day of February, the month of amore, and for the next few weeks we'll be sharing our stories for "The Look of Love" series.

My husband and I have been together for thirty three years, and married for twenty five. We met in ninth grade, and while we dated a few other people here and there, neither of us has had another serious relationship.

Looking back at our life together so far, it seems to have been broken into three distinct acts. Act One took place in the days we like to call "BC" (before children). Those romantic times of getting to know each other, falling in love, planning a wedding, and beginning a life together. It was so easy to be in love during Act One.

Act Two opened with the birth of our first son. Sleepless nights, bleary days, too much to do, and not a lot of time for each other. Most days we were mom and dad instead of husband and wife. Trying our best to remember who we were in Act One, to put ourselves first sometimes, because we knew that SOMEDAY, the kids would be out of the house, and we'd be alone again. We didn't want to look at each other and wonder what happened to "us".

And now SOMEDAY is almost here. Act Three is about to begin. We have no idea how things will unfold, but it's exciting to think about. In the midst of change, and the sadness I'm feeling about the empty nest, there's comfort in knowing that my husband will be there, waiting to fall in love with me again.

People sometimes ask how we've managed to stay happily together for so long. I'm not sure I really know. We try to always treat each other with kindness, even when we're hopping mad. We know that a good relationship takes hard work, but since we're in it for the long haul, we may as well enjoy the journey. We're best friends, and we really, really like each other. But mostly, I think we just got lucky. He's my lobster, and I'm his, and in the big wide sea, we found each other.

The curtain rises on Act Three...

Lana is a regular contributor to The Blended Blog. These days you can find her working in her hardware business, trying to keep up with her two boys and crazy husband, and blogging at Two Teens And Their Mama.

February 01, 2016
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An Elmo Christmas

"Christmas," "lana"

There are so many good Christmas memories locked forever in my mind. Like the years we visited my grandparents in California, and went to the beach on Christmas Day.

Or the first year my husband and I were married, waking up to a white Christmas.

Or Christmas 1997, when I had a two year old and a newborn. If I'm being honest, I don't really remember that one, due to sleep deprivation. But I'm sure it was magical, because children make everything even better at Christmas.

Which brings me to one of my best Christmas memories; the year my sister gave C a Tickle Me Elmo. C and I watched Sesame Street every morning, and while he loved Big Bird, Oscar the Grouch, and Ernie, Elmo was by far his favorite character.

In August my sister was shopping, saw a talking Tickle Me Elmo, and knew it would be the perfect gift for C. As the holidays got closer, Tickle Me Elmo became the "hot property" that everyone wanted for Christmas. People were waiting in hours long lines when new shipments came in, and soon buyers were willing to pay $300 or more for this $50 toy.

When a co-worker found out that my sister had one tucked away, she offered her $500. All of us encouraged D to sell Elmo. She could have used the money, and C would never have known the difference. But Aunt D wanted C to have it.

On Christmas morning I watched nervously as C ripped the paper off the gift. What if he played with Elmo for a few minutes and then cast him aside? I knew I would feel bad if he didn't love him as much as my sister was hoping he would.

C pulled Elmo from the box, and gave him a wary glance as he started to talk. By the time Elmo began laughing and shaking, C was smiling and giggling along. He went everywhere with C that day. Actually, they were pretty inseparable for years, to the point where I thought I might go crazy if I heard that high pitched voice one more time. Many nights Elmo's signature laugh would come from C's room when he rolled onto him in his sleep.

Tickle Me Elmo is still with us, packed away in a box somewhere. C has grown, and so have his toys. This year he got skis and tools for Christmas, and while they made him smile, there's nothing like that first special gift that holds a place in your heart.

Or your mom's.

Which is probably why I've kept Elmo all these years. Maybe I'll be able to pass him on to a grandchild someday, and recapture the sweet Christmas memory of that curly haired boy, so enthralled with a stuffed animal that giggled.

I hope that this holiday season has been full of new memories for all of you. Happy New Year!

December 27, 2015
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I'm Your Mom, Not Your Friend

"lana," "parenting"

I'm the mom to two great young men. They're smart, kind, empathetic and fun to be around. Which is probably mostly "the luck of the draw", but I like to think I had a little bit to do with it. While my husband and I are by no means the perfect parents, we've done a few things right. Our main parenting philosophy?

My kids have lots of friends. I am not one of them.

Webster defines friend as "a person attached to another by feelings of affection, who gives assistance". Well, I guess that sounds like my relationship with my boys. Most days I have affection for them, and I definitely give assistance. A lot.

Yet I am not friends with my kids. The way I see it, that's not my role. Parenting is an amazing experience and I'm so glad I've gotten to participate. It is the hardest job I have ever had. Honestly, being their friend would be so much easier.

When you're growing up, a friend is the person you hang out with, tell your deepest secrets to, and sometimes get in trouble with. But even though your friends have "feelings of affection" for you, they might not always have your best interests at heart. That's where mom and dad come in.

Everyone parents differently, and I would never tell someone that they are doing it wrong. But for me, I can't try to be my kids' best bud or worry if they're going to be upset when I make the hard decisions. My boys are mad at me on a weekly basis. If you ask them, they will probably say daily. It just goes with the territory.

If I were to spend my time trying to be their friend, I'd lose sight of being their mom. And deep down, I think they both want me to be their parent. They want me to set boundaries and limits, to point out that they might be making a wrong choice, to guide them through these really hard years when they are becoming who they are destined to be. Right now they don't like it, but someday they'll thank me. At least I hope so.

Being a parent instead of a friend doesn't mean they don't confide in me, laugh with me, and have fun with me. As I was writing this, my 18 year old called and gave me the "best mom" award because I offered to make him soup and grilled cheese when he got home from swim practice. And we're not even friends!

I figure if I do the best I can to parent them now, they will grow up to be good human beings. The kind of young men that people want to be friends with. And THEN I can be their friend too.

December 15, 2015
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Featured on Friday

"Featured Friday," "lana"

December 11, 2015
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Create28 Week 1

Hippity Hoppity, Easter's On It's Way!

The Look Of Love: Act Three

An Elmo Christmas

I'm Your Mom, Not Your Friend

Featured on Friday

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